I've got a taste for the macabre
I've got a longing for the weird
I know somewhere there's lunacy to spare
Where sanity's grown a beard
The pinnacle of human invention
The absolute in absolutely nuts
A crucible of all that's cool
No ifs and no buts
I want you to find it, I want you to find it
Oh it would fill me with glee
I want you to find my heart's desire
The secret of the laborat'ry
(The secret of the lab)
What's that pickled in a jam jar?
Oooh, what's that pinned onto the wall?
A squirrel with a man's leg, a kitten in a Scotch egg
A bulldog with no nostrils
Oh what wonderment and mischief
Oh what playful anarchy
An elephant with mumps, a camel with no humps
I long to see
I want you to find it, I want you to find it
Oh it would fill me with glee
I want you to find my heart's desire
The secret of the laborat'ry
(The secret of the lab)
